The Incredible Mangoes

feb 20th '09

it's been a shitty week but it's getting better, i think. tonight is going to be the 10th night in a row that we have been getting wasted. it feels like a routine. i know we need to stop soon. maybe monday.

so this is what last weekend was like:

Thursday: Grape Cigar tells me she wants to chill with Birdie and me, so i'm like yeah okay cool, come over to Birdie's house. and since Grape Cigar never ever leaves her apartment i was not expecting her to take a 45 minute train to us. but surprisingly she does. she comes over with our mutual friend. Birdie and i score some weed, buy some wine etc. and we have a good, chilled out night.

Friday: Grape Cigar wants to hang out with us again so i invite her over again. she comes with a different friend. Birdie and Cherry are telling me that she is totally into me and she's making an effort. and i guess it made sense. nobody would travel that long and take a cab home twice in a row without an incentive. so we do the same thing again. and while playing 'never have i ever' she drinks to "never have i ever had sexual feelings for anyone in this room". damn. Cherry, Birdie and Hamster keep trying to leave us alone in the room. but no, it just wasn't right. she left at 5 am.

Saturday: it's valentines day and i know she has nothing to do so i invite her over. she comes. and all of us get wasted again. Birdie's room turns into a mini-party because people keep coming over randomly all night long. and at this point i realized that she is definitely into someone and that could either be me or Birdie. oh fuck.

Sunday: gangster brothers throw a party. and it was actually a pretty cool party but there was so much fucked up drama that i don't even know what to call that party. and we are smashed this night. totally gone. and Grape Cigar is there and completely drunk out of her mind (she had been complaining that she had not gotten wasted the previous nights). and Birdie, Cherry and the Gangster Brothers are like gooooo forrr ittttt. but obviously i couldn't, because i didn't want to be taking advantage of someone because they're drunk, but i also wanted to so the most logical thing seemed to be to ask.

but when i go to her she starts talking to me about how she just wants to make out with Birdie right now!!! and she admits that she would also make out with Cherry (and at this point Birdie and Cherry are somewhere in the background eating each others faces which makes it so much worse because Grape Cigar is only thinking about jumping in and joining them). she also admitted that she would make out with a third chick at the party. and so i finally asked her if she would make out with me? and she says no she wouldn't.

the morning after we figured that she has a thing for Birdie and it made perfect sense. it really really sucked though. i knew she hadn't been coming all these days for me but before the party, i was convinced she was there for me. Birdie and i were in the same position last summer. and i didn't think i would be in it again. i really liked Grape Cigar, and still do. i have met a lot of people here but so far she has been the only one who is constantly on the same page as me. there is always flowing conversation and life when i am with her. but this is just another one of those things i will obsess about which will amount to nothing. she already has a date tomorrow with some girl she met somewhere.

- doggie